pooopooo

really there is nothing to update about, argh

times like this always occcurs in life but it is a bothersome
causing me to lose control of my emotion and become sad
conflicts is filling up and also tumbling down, i'm lying dead
gotta calm myself, even tears is falling down and i'm terrified

truth been told, refusing to believe such truth like its lie
when hurt yourself too much, its only right that you don't believe
its called self-defence, don't want no scars leaving a mark
marks that reminds you the pain and the horror of it

i am facing it, not trying to avoid anything at all
assumption had got you no where, open your eyes
see what is lying or hanging in front of you
it might be destiny or your answer that you are waiting for

tell me that when i was FIFTEEN, i might believe you
now that i am not, cleary i don't believe you anymore
not as naive as i was before, those petty thoughts is gone
don't expect me to believe or answer those questions

its already gone, all i can tell you now

New blog skin

its time that i change my blog skin to something nicer,
notice its not dark and gloomly, no longer look like a EMO blog
extra features is the vintage effects, that totally caught my eyes
i think this blog skin is gonna hang around my blog for some times



exams is close and near that its taking my breathe away
first term of my form 5 life is gonna end soon and i need to say goodbye again
not freaking out about the assessment though, not much of a horror
but what i cannot wait is the holidays after the exams


'every cloud have its silver lining'

the pictures is sadly not taken by me =(

i do want to take nice pictures, but there isn't camera for me to use
RESTRICTED somehow

. . .

argh, exams is visiting in four days
am very lazy and nothing to blog about

there will be fairytale

everyday of my life, emotions will be running through my veins
no matter its good or bad, i will have all kinds of feeling
but i know there is a moment that i can call my own fairytale
no matter how bad it is, there is bound to be a fairytale occur by my side

how sad

its back to normal, well there is nothing to blog !

6th day

today went to watch Valentine's Day, and i want to wach again

LOVE dark mocha frappuccino

the also 5th day

its the fifth day, no pictures as no camera ~



its yesterday's pictures

the 'happy' 4th day

*a emo picture for the emo day*

this is the 4th day of chinese new year, feeling so hurt
aren't new year suppose to be a happy memory ?
well, things is not always as it seems to be, right ?
judgement had been made and proven guilty

feel like a ton of load fell on me and feeling unconcious
according to someone, everything i do is childish
well whether the fact is right or wrong, you're a still hypocrite
you said i like to deny all the wrong and just accept the rights only

according to me, you are just the same and always filled with assumption
you said i assume too much that i don't even care try
who said, i tried and insisted, the ending ain't beautiful to be seen
in other words, are you calling me a liar ?

imma keeping in a silence thoughts and continue living in a fantasy
i find fantasy is a great place to heal the scars and wounds
time is also essential in the process of healing, find it so hard to take
am really and truly, very tired to think for another person


*high hopes revealing*

you thought it was only once, but its repeated so many times
that i lost count, now i don't even bother to try again
this is no longer an petty assumption, i rather stay in my naive world
also rather act innocent, don't want give no opinion !

it just hurt so badly and i will never be the same again
i live and learn from the scars and bruise that i obtained
its so painful to relive the same moment that brings you down
currently feeling very, very low that i can feel nothing at all

never thought i will be this low, can't think straight either
its new year after all, gotta still look happy, meaning fake it
gotta fake everything, in life there's a lot of synthetic things
this certainly does not exclude human's expression


*look its a blank hope, again*

even if no one bother to read this, at least i am relief
relief that i let out this emotional feelings that is hanging around
convincing myself to let it go is so tough and its just crazy
futhermore, those who is near and dear to me don't even believe me

no expectation of understanding from anyone anymore

why do i even bother to have high expectation from anyone
promises made is not necessary fullfill and don't have make one
a lot of people said promise is not meant to be keep
don't want to listen and make any promise

maybe i am still naive to believe people's given trust
trust have proven to me a lot and taught me to be strong
never 100% rely on someone, truly disheartened
perfection must be obtain by you, yourself not by others

its very hard for me to have high hopes, failure kept on flooding in
looking beyond it, also never make someone promise you something
knowing that they will keep it and make it happen
let me know if they is a living person who keeps promises

not that i want to think the negatives, just can't help it
the percentage of good happening is always so low
prediction of the worse is easily guessed
tell me who doesn't want a easy life ?

i see things that you don't see, that's naive ?
i just keep quiet knowing that you don't believe me
worst of all, you named me as a lunatic !
what a way to appreciate a person, feel so lucky !

i maybe using sarcasm but i truly mean the opposites
you have leave me no reasons to believe you anymore
tell you what that i call myself naive, the thing is
kept on having high hopes on you and failure you brought me!

this is where i end this post now, tears is filling in my eyes !

forgive and forget is never easy !

the fab 3rd day

i know its getting bored in my blog, everything is lesser
less pictures, less words and less elaboration, others words DETAILS
its already the third day of chinese new year, sure its bored
was about to go out for a movie, but time can't meet our schedule

i'm seriously lazy and bored to update my blog !!
just look at my super vain pictures and theres more


LOOK its my 3rd outfit for new year !
not really showing you people what am i wearing


it sure looks like its about to rain but its a liar
its still sunny and really, really HOT


this is the glam and chic shades i bought yesterday when i'm in genting
some of them told me its like Lady GaGa's glamorous shades
well, i don't really care as long its wear-able and NICE
be charmed by me and this shades !


SO VAIN ~



STILL so VAIN

-

the weather, its burning hot !

the 2nd day ~

so obvious its the second day of the new year !
went to Genting Highland today ~




finally wearing my new sneakers


my brother was caught on a candid shot !


my sister reday for the action

its CNY and Valentine

well today its the official first day for Chinese New Year
this is a special year as its fall on valentine day

there is nothing special about valentine day for me
because i have no one special to celebrate with



trying to update on what i am wearing on new year


as you can see i don't have much colours to wear, the only visible colours
is Electric blue, soft pink and grey/black


its a new belt that my dad randomly bought it


one more details its white, i'm wearing it and blogging with it


well, i not lonely or is it ?


-

THE blogger hereby WISHES my readers

HAPPY CHINESE YEAR AND HAPPY VALENTINE DAY

CNY eve !

today, its the eve for Chinese New Year and also Valentine Day
i'm sure everyone is having a last minute preparation or touch-up
people will be waking up early and clean the house
just so its presentable to everyone, don't want leave a bad remark for visitors

this year, imma being hardworking to take pictures for my readers
i also admit that i did help out, so don't say i'm lazy a !
once again imma gonna confess that i'm addicted to vintage pictures
nah, the real term for these photos is Crossed-Process photography

so tell me whether clear, sharp pics or vintagey, cross-process pics nicer !


where did it happen?
it was venued in a housing area called, Sungai Long
why did i name the picture 'Plastic Town' ?
its because it look like a fake town to me when i was editting it


i leave it as a secret for you all, don't want to tell what's that


mum's *insertasuitablename* prawn, tastes AWESOME
personally don't know what is the name, mum just followed some recipe


-

if you're chinese, you will definately pray the LUNCH before having them
its like an offering for your ancestors, also a REUNION lunch


so here's mine;







-

mum bought lotsa flowers for praying and displaying purposes


look at the pink daisy, so pretty !


every year, my parents buys a lot of pots of this
not the normal kind but the massive size !


remember the peach blossom from previous post, just scroll down
apparently its dying, the flowers kept on falling off, how sad


aside those fallen off, there is still some blooming now

-
also got myself a pretty, high-cut sneakers
i prefer to call it my boots, tell me its nice ;D


-

daylight is passing by, dusk is meeting us soon


wondering what colour will it be when the night falls out

Cause i'll never be the same, if we ever meet again !

another short one !

you all know what ? actually i did plan to update my blog earlier
but i was lazy as school in form 5 is killing me and my energy level
if i were to update, i will update about something CNYish or about FASHION no?

JUST so let you all know, i don't like OVERRATED things !

what to do

there is a lot of things being running thru' my head and i'm random
this has break me down mentally, can't think straight for these few days
had major due to the hot weather !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

oowwhh

' i don't care what people says, the rush is worth the price i'm paying,
i get so high when i'm you ! '

YOUR LOVE IS MY DRUG !

the END

this will be last continuous post for the preparation of CNY
shall let the pictures speaks for itself, lazy and not in mood













-

take time to realise a lot of things, but its still insufficient time too

its always the end of something and a new beginning will sprout soon

still preparing

this is a continuous post from yesterday update


did you all make a heartwarming phone call to your dearest one?
did you greet your friends and did you receive season greetings from everyone?


whether its fake or real one, as long durable
durable as in usable and also looks nice









don't know what else to say !

CNY preparation

this whole morning, i was busy preparing my house for chinese new year
like decoarate it, by it i meant the living room, the garden and also the kitchen !
since that i did not post much pictures lately, i meant pictures that actually belongs to me
i took the camera and start taking pictures of the decorations and stuffs ...

i'm sure that everyone is either spring cleaning their houses
or decorating with some 'ang ang' ornaments around the house

shall we go on?


newly bought golden lanterns with beautiful peach blossom


here is some of the decorating items that keep on reusing
still looks good after using them for 3 years, can save money


chinese new year ornament that has been here since 3 years ago
why throw it away, when its still so new ?


guess what this ??


if you guess red ribbon ball, then you are right !
its actually a long, long red cloth with ribbon balls that people hang on the door

ignore my leg though .....


not sure whether this is a genuine bamboo trees, but it look like one to me
the mini lanterns were place over these bamboos


this is some fake peach blossom that come with the gift hamper
the colour looks warm and at the same time tasty, weird right?


now this is a real peach blossom, it looks like its a dying though
why ? can't adapt to Malaysia's hot weather, hope it can last till CNY is over

here is some lame questions :

A: why must decorate with red colour stuffs lei ?
B: because everyone want ang ang mah !
A: then why must ang ang lei?
B: erm, erm maybe because aa, chinese new year gua ?

FIN